I made Cancer "MY BITCH"!

4 year CANCERVERSARY!

2011-10-07T09:55:00.001-05:00

That's right folks! A few days ago I celebrated my 4 year CANCERVERSARY!

WOOT WOOT!

Ain't no party like a PET scan party...

2011-01-24T08:29:00.001-05:00

'Cause a PET scan party don't stop! I'm sitting in the chair waiting to be scanned. My oncologist bumped my PET scan up by 6 months because my tonsils were showing uptake.
If they are still showing uptake, I will have them cut out! Doesn't that sound like a shit load of fun?

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

2011 Pinup Calendar! Proceeds donated to Leukemia and Lymphoma Society!

2010-10-21T21:27:00.000-05:00

You all asked for it, now here it is! The official 2011 Boudoir Louisville Pinup Girl Calendar!

Proceeds from the sale of this snazzy calendar will be donated to The Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. As some of you may know, 3 years ago I beat stage IV Hodgkin's Lymphoma. Order a few, they make FANTASTIC gifts! It's only a buck-a-month! Cough it up you cheapskate.

CLICK HERE to order your very own copy!

Still cancer free!

2010-07-21T09:51:00.001-05:00

I'm sitting in the chair at my oncology office with a needle hanging out of my port!
Good times!
Just got the results from my PET scan, I'm still cancer free!!!
My tonsils were showing uptake, so now those need to come out! Guess I'll be sitting around eating ice-cream for a few days!

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

Had another PET scan today...

2010-07-13T17:03:00.000-05:00

Today I had another PET scan...
HOPEFULLY a non-eventful PET scan.
They gave me a disc of the scan images, but I have not had a chance to give it a look. My oncology appointment isn't for another week. BLA BLA BLA, same story every 6 months!

Clogged up port!

2010-06-27T12:01:00.000-05:00

So today I went in to my oncologist's office for my monthly port flush. YES, I still have my port after a few years!
The nurse tried to get blood out of the thing but couldn't. It was totally clogged with butter and bacon fat!
We found early on that I needed to have my port flushed every 4 weeks. I got so damn busy last month I TOTALLY forgot to go in for my flush.
The nurse loaded it full of some liquid that would dissolve the blood clot that was in the port.
WAIT A FRIGGIN' MINUTE!
BLOOD CLOT?!!!
Don't those kill people?

Dexter star Michael C. Hall diagnosed with Hodgkin's Lymphoma

2010-01-14T08:58:00.003-05:00

So I have a bone to pick with Mr. Hall!
In every article I have read, he refers to Hodgkin's Lymphoma as being "Imminently Curable and treatable". He keeps making comments that the Hodge is not that big of a deal. People still die from this shit Dexter!
I think in order for him to make this up to me, he needs to arrange a small walk on role for me on Dexter...

Posted from a news release:
Michael Hall, an actor who has played a role on a number of TV shows including Six Feet Under and Dexter has reportedly been battling cancer. He announced the news yesterday, but did not say when he was diagnosed.

"I feel fortunate to have been diagnosed with an imminently treatable and curable condition, and I thank my doctors and nurses for their expertise and care," Hall, 38, said Wednesday in a statement. His medical team is based in the Los Angeles area.

His spokesman, Craig Bankey, said Hall’s cancer is in remission but the actor will continue scheduled treatments.

Mr. Hall and his wife "Dexter" costar Jennifer Carpenter plan to attend Sunday's Golden Globes as Hall's dominated for the best dramatic actor and the show as the best drama. He is nominated for his role as Dexter Morgan, a serial killer working with the police.

He also plans to attend the Screen Actors Guild Awards the following Saturday, where Hall and the cast are also nominated. He will return to shooting the fifth season of Dexter later this year.

His father died of cancer when Hall was eleven years old.

Ethan Zohn, winner of Survivor Africa, Talks About Hodgkin’s Lymphoma

2010-01-05T23:16:00.003-05:00

THIS IS A REPOST FROM THE GREAT FOLKS OVER AT GiveForward.com!

Most reality TV stars have their fifteen minutes of fame and then are never heard from again (unless of course they later appear on the Surreal World). But Not Ethan Zohn. In 2002 Ethan took home $1,000,000 for winning Survivor Africa and instead of wasting his money like so many others, he used it to help start a non-profit called Grass Roots Soccer that fights the spread of HIV/AIDS. Today, the organization has helped educate over 300,000 young people in 15 different countries around the world and has some pretty heavy hitters like Bill and Melinda Gates, Nike and the Ford Foundation backing it.

But conquering reality TV and co-founding a global non-profit pale in comparison with Ethan’s most recent challenge – a battle with cancer. Since last April, Ethan has been publicly battling a rare form of Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. Fortunately, Ethan had some great news recently. As reported by People Magazine on December 10, Ethan’s most recent PET scan showed that this Survivor is crushing cancer and for the first time since his diagnosis he has no active cancer cells in his body.

Not only did Ethan beat cancer, but by taking his battle public he has helped others get diagnosed including a 25-year-old GiveForward user who raised $1800 on GiveForward for his Hodgkin’s treatments after reading an article about Ethan in People magazine.

I recently had the opportunity to chat with Ethan about his battle with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma and how young adults are falling through the cracks in the fight against cancer. You can also read the original unedited interview on PlayCity

Ethan Austin: In your battle with Hodgkin’s Disease you’ve managed to keep a positive attitude throughout. How does fighting cancer compare with some of the other things you’ve done in your life like winning Survivor or starting a global non-profit?

EZ: It doesn’t even compare at all. This is by far the most difficult thing I have ever faced. I mean this is the closest I’ve ever come to death. You might look okay on the outside but inside your body, there is a war of the worlds going on. It’s a challenge. But I just got some really good news the other day so I’m feeling okay.

EA: You’ve been very public about your fight. A lot of people with cancer choose to keep the matter private. Is there anything you want to say to other young people out there battling Hodgkin’s?

EZ: I’ve been fortunate enough to have this platform to speak and I hope to be a megaphone for this generation. By being so public my goal has really just been to bring awareness to the issue. Young people in their 20s and 30s are often forgotten in the fight against cancer. There’s been huge improvements in survival rates for older adults and with pediatric cancers but survivor rates for young adults haven’t improved in 30 years. Today, a young adult has the same chance of getting and dying of cancer as they did in the 1970s. Our demographic has fallen through the cracks on every front including clinical, research, financial and pychosocial.

EA: In your opinion, what needs to be done so our generation stops falling through the cracks so to speak?

EZ: We need more money to go to research for treatment. For those with cancer or those who will diagnosed with it, new treatments can literally be a matter of life and death. But improving survival rates is not just about more money for research. It’s also about early detection.

Early detection is one of the biggest keys to surviving cancer, but most young adults are diagnosed with Stage IV when it’s often too late. One of the problems is that our generation thinks we’re invincible. Many students and young professionals either don’t have access to doctors or choose not to see them. Part of the problem also lies with the health care providers. A lot of doctors misdiagnose cancer. They think the patient is too young to have cancer so they don’t diagnose it until its too late. We need to train health care providers to consider cancer as a possibility to ensure earlier diagnosis.

There are other issues that we need to work on as well such as lack of access to clinical trials and the lack of age-appropriate support for young adults with cancer. At treatment, I see older and younger. Diapers and dentures. I feel like I’m the only going through this because I never see anyone like myself. But on the positive side, I think the voice of the young adult with cancer is now being heard. We each have a role to play in supporting research and it’s urgent that everyone continues to support this effort.
EA: Last Question. This one is non-cancer relatated: I’ve heard you appeared on an episode of Discovery Channel’s Pitchmen with the late, great Billy Mays to pitch the EZCrunch Bowl (a bowl that is supposed to keep cereal from getting soggy). Please indulge us. Does this thing really work, or did you just come up with the idea because you wanted to meet the one and only, supremely awesome Billy Mays?

Ha. Yeah it really works. I had the idea back in college in 1994. I was just trying to come up with something fun that makes people happy.

[editors note: Ethan was too modest to plug EZ crunch bowl but I have done an independent investigation and early reports indicate that the bowl is going to be awesome to quite awesome. You can be the first on your block to own this revolutionary cereal-saving device by pre-ordering yours today at EZcrunchbowl.com]

Cancer, you are STILL my Bitch!

2010-01-05T23:13:00.003-05:00

Yeah, that's right Mr. Cancer! You are still my BITCH!
Pet scan came back clean, no evidence of disease!
I still have a few enlarged nodes in my chest, but they are unchanged from my last 4 PET/CT scans and have 0 uptake.

That's why I'm like "Fuck-a-bunch-a-cancer"!

Another PET scan...

2009-12-01T09:12:00.002-05:00

I have my 2.5 year PET scan coming up in a week or so.
Good times! Maybe they will have Christmas tunes at screamingly loud levels during the scan like they did last year!

YEAH!

2 YEAR CANCERVERSARY!

2009-10-21T09:49:00.002-05:00

That's right folks! It has been 2 years since I kicked Mr. Cancer square in the balls!
Fuck you Cancer!

Breast Cancer Awareness Month?

2009-10-08T08:21:00.001-05:00

Breast Cancer Awareness Month? That's right. October is Breast Cancer Awareness Month.
You show me someone who has NOT heard of Breast Cancer and I will show you the most ignorant son-of-a-bitch to walk the earth!
Where's my Lymphoma Month?

Sad...

2009-10-02T08:41:00.003-05:00

Yesterday one of my Hodge Friends lost her 13 year battle.
Adrienne, you will be missed.

The photo below was taken in Boston a year or so ago.
Adrienne is on the far left.

My blog was mentioned in Newsweek!

2009-07-31T13:58:00.003-05:00

The other day, Newsweek did a story on young folks with cancer. They talked about how we use humor to get through the whole cancer thing. In the article, they mentioned a few humorous cancer blogs, mine was one of them.

Below is the article.

A Malignant Melanoma Walks Into a Bar...
Cancer kills more young people than any other disease, and survival rates have not improved in more than 30 years for people in their 20s and 30s. How some patients are using humor to fight back.

Crammed inside a subway car in Manhattan—feeling remarkably generous, as I often do these days—I smiled at a young woman with a fancy black ponytail hairdo who was intensely staring at me. She didn't smile back. She said: "This is the second time you stepped on my shoe."

It was quite possible that I stepped on her foot. I'm a little clumsy nowadays. Almost three years ago, at age 29, I was diagnosed with stage III colon cancer The chemotherapy treatment that followed left me, among other keepsakes, with neuropathy in my feet, numbness and tingling similar to what advanced diabetes patients experience. One day I walked two blocks barefoot before I noticed my missing sandal.

"I'm sorry," I said, then whispered, "I know this will sound strange, but I can't feel my feet."

She rolled her eyes.

It was funny. In this crowded train, nobody was paying attention to my cancer, and it all seemed surreal again: my numb feet, my uncertain life expectancy, the loneliness, all coupled with gratitude for being alive, even if it means sharing a world with this bitch on the 1 train.

Cancer. Hilarious. I later typed these words into Google and found Kaylin Andres, a 24-year-old San Francisco fashion designer who was diagnosed with Ewing's sarcoma, a rare form of bone cancer normally fond in children, last September. She uses her blog, Cancer Is Hilarious, to document her experience in a way young people could relate. Thank God for cancer humor. I need something other than yet another study that offered grim survival rates or scary-sounding side effects.

Cancer Is Hilarious is just one of the hundreds of blogs combining realistic cancer confessions with humor: Making Cancer My Bitch. My Blood Hates Me. What’s Up Your Butt?Kiss My Bald Head. I’m Not an Asshole. Surgically Speaking. I’ve Still Got Both My Nuts. Virtually all of them are written by cancer patients younger than 40. The blogs are just one way younger patients are addressing the absurdity of life with cancer with humor, rather than pink-ribboned, glassy-eyed earnestness.

About 70,000 people between the ages of 18 and 40 are diagnosed with cancer every year, representing about 6 percent of all new cancer cases. About 10,000 young adults die from cancer annually, more than from any other disease. This is not the best statistic to stumble on when you are looking online for hope, as I did in September 2006 after my doctor told me he found a growth in my colon. There I was—nonsmoker, athlete, young—diagnosed with colon cancer, the disease that more commonly afflicts overweight, elderly men. And all I could think was: how inconvenient. I was a travel writer and had just scheduled trips to Rome and Cologne for the following week. Bummer. I would have to reschedule those flights.

Then I did what anyone of my generation would do: I Googled "colon cancer." Within seconds, I found out that my cancer stage, advanced stage IIIC, gave me a 44 percent chance to survive five years. I swore I would never use the Internet to research colon cancer again. (That promise lasted all of five days)

At the same time, I started receiving books, stacks of self-help volumes from well-meaning people. Books claiming that cancer was hate materialized in the body of people who don't love enough. Books promising you can cure cancer by drinking wheat-grass juice. It made me want to throw up, even before my chemotherapy regimen started and I became a vomiting expert. I didn't need more things to make me feel guilty and excluded. I already felt like an outsider. I was by far the youngest patient in the oncology ward. I was too cynical to believe herbal remedies were going to cure me but unwilling to venture onto medical Web sites, where the depressing prognosis stats were lurking, ready to scare the hell out of me.

That's when I found Planet Cancer, the most popular cancer humor Web site. It was founded in 1995 by Robin Blue, Paul Cox, and Heidi Schultz Adams, Texans and cancer survivors then in their 20s. They coined the term "cancertainment" to describe the growing subculture of young cancer patients seeking both more information and a space to indulge in inside jokes like "What's one of the top reasons to date a cancer chick? Recreational drugs are paid for by insurance."

According to Kairol Rosenthal, author of Everything Changes: The Insider's Guide to Cancer In Your 20's and 30's, the traditional cancer support system is set up to deal with older patients. Young people want to talk about different issues that the typical cancer patient might consider taboo: How do I have sex with a colostomy bag? How do I masturbate in a hospital? Will I have to choose between chemo and grad school? Rosenthal, a slim brunette with a posture of a dancer, was diagnosed with thyroid cancer nine years ago, when she was a modern dance choreographer. Unable to take radiation treatment, she currently has two tumors resting on her jugular vein, although they haven't been growing. Now 36 years old, the Chicago resident doesn't believe in the benefits of thinking positive. "I believe in the power of realistic thinking," she said. "And the reality is, you know, this sucks."

This is a sharp departure from the cancer survivorship rhetoric of the last 20 years. For members of an earlier generation, curing oneself of cancer was often associated with turning inward to positive thinking and spirituality and away from anything resembling cynicism and irony. Experts nowadays say that the power of positive thinking might be overrated (thankfully). Jimmie Holland, a psychiatrist at the Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center in New York and the author of The Human Side of Cancer, confirms that patients often feel that being sad, scared, upset or angry is unacceptable and that emotions can somehow make their tumors grow. "For most patients, cancer is the most difficult and frightening experience they have ever encountered," she writes, and she argues that the emphasis on positive attitude invalidates people's natural and understandable reactions to a deadly disease. "Many negative, pessimistic people survive cancer, while others who believe positive attitudes will cure it do not. I do not believe for an instant that people whose cancer progresses have a weaker spirit or character than anyone else."

Despite their cynicism, young cancer patients are some of the most vocal cancer activists out there, precisely because they don't feel like they need to whisper after they lose a breast, a testicle, or sex drive. They start foundations, write books and blogs, launch clubs, and use technology to spread the news. Garland Harwood, a 29-year-old public-relations manager, combined both advocacy and humor when he planned a fundraising event on behalf of the American Cancer Society of Brooklyn, N.Y., which helped when he was diagnosed with sarcoma four years ago. Leery of the usual cancer fundraising event, where clichés are recited and pictures of deceased patients put up in a heart-wrenching slideshow, Harwood instead launched "Comedy for Cancer," a fundraising event in Brooklyn, featuring the stand-up comedian and Hodgkin's lymphoma survivor Nick Ross.

Ross, 27, first got the idea to create a stand-up show about cancer last year, when a man sitting on next to him on the bus asked: "Did you shave your head because you're losing your hair?" Ross, briefly appalled by the incongruity of the question, decided to be brutally honest: "No, man. I am on chemotherapy." Hoping to reconcile with a bald cancer patient, the man offered: "I am in AA." The man's friend chimed in, "I'm addicted to porn." Ross compiled this and other absurd moments in his life as a marginalized citizen in his 35-minute stand-up show, excerpts of which he performed at the fundraiser.

"Comedy for Cancer" was a huge success and resonated especially well with the "Brooklyn hipster crowd," says Harwood. Only one person in the audience, a cancer patient, said later it was "just too much." Cancer was traumatic for her, and joking about it made it worse.

The reality of cancer among young patients obviously isn't funny at all. As a group, we often fall into a no-man's land between pediatric oncology and adult oncology, with few traditional outlets able to cater to our needs. Young adults are the largest underinsured group. We face threats not just to our lives but our fertility, dating prospects, and financial stability. Often, we're long misdiagnosed as "too young for cancer," and by the time the disease is identified, it's too late for an effective treatment.

Jill Harrison, a 26-year-old director-playwright, was misdiagnosed by her general practitioner for months after "getting the flu over and over" five years ago. She had lung cancer, an unlikely scenario for a 21-year-old nonsmoker with no family history of lung cancer. After a successful surgery and no reoccurrence of cancer so far, Harrison is grateful her generation and many of her friends were comfortable with "putting it all out there." Humor and openness, she said, saved her life. She has just finished writing a play called In Search of Hope. It starts with the main character, Hope, walking into a radiation room insisting that she be allowed to bring in her iPod to drown out the radio, playing Tony Bennett's "Put On a Happy Face."

But Harrison looks for meaning behind all the humor and sarcasm. To her generation, she says, "everything is funny." She argues that while funny cancer blogs create an instant community, they fail to truly connect people. "It's just another version of not talking about it," she says. She found the right mix of support and cancertainment through the foundation I'm Too Young For This! "They are a rocking young-adult support group because they are all about inspiring connections and talking about 'it,' " she says.

The I’m Too Young For This! Web site functions as an aggregator of all organizations and blogs by young patients. It uses the arts and social media to organize, mobilize and activate young adults, destigmatize cancer as a death sentence, and make it easy to talk openly. They sell "Stupid Cancer" merchandise (WHITE BLOOD CELLS ARE FOR LOSERS T shirt, anyone?) and organize Stupid Cancer Happy Hours. "There are huge generational disconnects with the old-school, big-box cancer societies," said Matthew Zachary, the founder and CEO of the I'm Too Young For This Cancer Foundation. "We're trying to be more hip and more relevant whereas those other charities come across as stodgy and out of touch."

As a part of the foundation's outreach effort, Zachary, 35, a survivor of pediatric brain cancer diagnosed in college, has been producing and co-hosting The Stupid Cancer Show out of the foundation's office in New York. With more than 18,000 live listeners each week, the internationally syndicated live talk-radio broadcast has become the voice of young adults with cancer. For the last two years, every Monday night he has been interviewing doctors who often have the "personality of oatmeal," mobilizing cancer patients to "kick cancer's ass," and being the cancertainer that he is, offering endless cancer jokes.

It's not always easy to poke fun at cancer. Zachary's friend, Susan Cross, 38, had just died of brain cancer the week before that day's show. During the broadcast, he asked everyone who was listening—PEOPLE at home, hospitals, and at work—FOR a brief moment of silence. One young adult dies of cancer every hour, he said. "Do I ever get numb?" he asks his audience. "I do, honestly."

So do I. Though I have been cancer-free since I finished chemo more than two years ago, I will always remain a cancer girl—THE affectionate nickname bestowed on me by friends. Last year, a genetic test reveled that my mother and I are carriers of the Lynch syndrome, an inherited gene mutation that causes not only significant risk of colorectal cancer (check), but also cancers of the uterus, ovary, stomach, small intestine, hepatobiliary tract, urinary tract, brain, and skin. So, aside from breast and lung cancers, I'm well suited for a BINGO on my oncology scorecard. My doctors try to be one step ahead by giving me annual colonoscopies, semiannual stomach endoscopies, annual PET scans, twice yearly blood work, annual skin checkups, twice yearly gynecologic smears and ultrasounds, and something else I'm probably forgetting. Chances are, on any given day, I'm either scheduling or rescheduling a doctor's appointment, waiting in a specialists' office or having a scope put in one of my body cavities.

Still, I have always joked about cancer, often to put other people at ease. At times, making jokes feels just as thin, forced, and fake as those HANG IN THERE kitten posters. But often, the reality is so overwhelming that all I can do is laugh.

At the Mercury Bar in New York's Hell's Kitchen, a fitting neighborhood for cancer survivors' bash, cancer patients and survivors below the age of 40 got together in May for a regular happy hour organized by I'm Too Young For This! "Chemo shooters" and "cancertinis" (basic shots and martinis, rebranded) were being served, and with cocktail in hand, nobody looked particularly sick—OR at least not the way "an amateur" would imagine a stereotypical cancer patient to look like. The invitation promised the event would attract people "who don't care whether you have one boob, one ball, two ports or even a hyperactive platelet count," and between the three dozen people who attended, my informal survey added up to at least 50 breasts and approximately as many testicles. People introduced themselves and their friends as efficiently as one would expect from the text-message and Twitter generation: Jennifer, ovarian, five years ago. Scott, testicular, three years in July.

Some attendees, such as Lindsey Brass, 29, went through relapses. Brass, a leukemia patient diagnosed at the age of 24 and relapsed by 25, finished law school last year just months after finishing chemo. At the bar, she mingled with other patients whom she met at previous events months ago and hadn't seen since. "People have been telling me 'We haven't seen you forever. Wow, you are alive!' " she said. "It is kind of a sick thing to say if you think about it." She laughed. Mortality jokes got progressively funnier as the night went on. It was hilarious. Really. You had to be there.

Please help me promote my funny cancer shirts!

2009-07-31T08:58:00.000-05:00

I am looking for Bloggers to place my FunnyCancerShirts.com banner into the sidebar of their Cancer blogs. The site is getting a lot of exposure, sales have been great. You can feel all warm and bubbly knowing that a portion of each sale will be donated to a different cancer charity. The more shirts I sell, the more money I donate. Anything you could do to help with this would be GREAT!

Thanks in advance,
Ryan

Cut and paste the info from the text box below to add this animated banner to your page. Perfect size for the sidebar of your blog!

<CENTER><A HREF="HTTP://www.funnycancershirts.com"></A></CENTER>

Cut and paste the info from the text box below to add this animated banner to your webpage.

<CENTER><A HREF="HTTP://www.funnycancershirts.com"></A></CENTER>

If you just want to go crazy, and do some SUPER PROMOTING, cut and paste the info from the text box below to add this HUGE Funny Cancer Shirt ad to your page. Because of its size, you would need to place this code into a "New Post" on your Blog.

<CENTER><A HREF="HTTP://www.Funnycancershirts.com"></A></CENTER>

If anyone needs help with adding the codes to your website or blog, please contact me.

Hodgkin's Lymphoma gains notable corporate sponsors!

2009-07-26T13:35:00.004-05:00

Below is a re post from a friend and fellow Hodgkin's ass kicker, Dwayne. Be sure to check out his blog, http://www.journalofaprizefighter.com
He is MUCH better at writing than I am...

Many people in the Hodgkin's community are unaware that we have several influential voices in corporate America.

Taco Bell President - Greg Creed and Honeywell International - Senior-Vice President Adriane Brown, are emerging as strong advocates for Hodgkin's research. Taco Bell is a household name and diversified manufacturer, Honeywell, is one of the top 50 largest companies in the country.

These two powerful executives reside on the Board of Directors for the Alese Coco - Fight 2 Win Foundation. This New York based foundation is dedicated strictly to Hodgkin's research. Alese was also my friend and we often conversed while she was being treated at Sloan-Kettering.
On July 1, 2009, Greg Creed and Taco Bell facilitated the taping of the first ever Public Service Announcement for Hodgkin's Lymphoma, which was taped at Paramount Studios in Hollywood, California. The PSA was directed by the Russo Brothers who directed Arrested Development and the motion picture, You, Me & Dupree.

I spoke to Paul Coco (Alese's father) last week and he described the PSA as: "Both challenging and gripping. It will bring much needed attention to a lymphoma that receives far too little consideration from pharmaceutical companies for research." He continued: "The fact is that Hodgkin's has somewhere between 25% - 40% recurrence rate and nearly half of all stem cell transplants fail, and that's unacceptable. We're striving for complete cure."

The 30 second spot will begin airing nationally on several major networks beginning this September.

I will keep you posted on details as they became available.

The foundation's website is www.fight2win.org

Curb Your Enthusiasm!

2009-07-26T12:29:00.004-05:00

Curb Your Enthusiasm has got to be one of my favorite shows of all time.
Recently, I started to re watch them. Will the new season ever start?

Anyway, in episode 34 of season 4 titled "The Weatherman", there is an ongoing joke about Hodgkin's Lymphoma.

When this originally aired, I gave it no thought, because I did not know I had the Hodge.

Anyway, give it a watch, hysterical!

"The good Hodgkins"
When Dr. Funkhouser's receptionist (Alyson Lyon) tell Larry that the Doctor "is not himself lately" because his uncle has Hodgkins disease, Larry says, "but it's the good Hodgkins." Hodgkin's disease is a type of lymphoma, a cancer that can occur in the lymph system. There are two types of lymphoma: Hodgkin's disease and non-Hodgkin's lymphoma.

My 18 month PET/CT Scan results!

2009-06-25T14:31:00.002-05:00

Today was my Oncologist visit to get the results from my 18 month pet/ct scan. Everything was great.
There were a few small areas that were enlarged. These lymphnodes were the same size for my last 3 scans, no new growth. They are making me get scanned again in 6 months just to be sure.
So far so good.

Click below to read the full report.

Look at my innards!

2009-06-17T15:14:00.001-05:00

Just loaded my PET/CT scan from today.
Everything looks good to me, but I am not trained at reading these damn things. I will not get the "official" word until next week.
There are a few little spots that are glowing though. I hope they are just my kidneys. They are glowing on both sides, hopefully nothing to worry about.
Have a look!

18 month PET/CT scan TOMORROW!

2009-06-16T17:39:00.002-05:00

That's right folks, tomorrow is my 18 month PET/CT Scan!
Hard to believe it has been a year and a half since I last had chemo. Hopefully I will have the same tech, I can read him like a book. After the scan I always ask him how it looked. He always says the same thing, but he can never look me in the eyes and say it when it is a bad scan.
Here's to the tech looking me right in the eyes tomorrow!

Congrats, and thanks, to Susan!

2009-06-03T08:25:00.004-05:00

The other day Susan sent me an email with a few pics from the Relay for Life event over in California.
Every year Susan heads up the Chemo Amigos team and raises a nice chunk of cash for Lymphoma research. For this, I thank her!
I also wanted to thank her for promoting my funny cancer shirts.
She sent me a pic of the lovely Cindy (1 yr post Hodgkin's Lymphoma) wearing one of my shirts!
Susan also snapped a pic of some of our HL forum buddies - Jenny, Bob, Linda and Brian.
Again, thanks Susan!

Controversial Cancer cards from Hallmark featured on the Today Show.

2009-04-09T07:35:00.008-05:00

Did anyone see this today?
Controversial? Are you F-ing kidding me? I guess they never saw any of my Cancer Cards!
There was some guy on the Today Show interview arguing with a lady that wrote some of the Cancer Cards for Hallmark.
His whole point was that the sender of the card was "Copping out" by sending a Hallmark Cancer Card. Seriously!?
This guy obviously never had cancer! He also thinks that cancer SHOULD be an awkward thing to talk about! This guy is nuts!
Talking about cancer is really hard for some folks. The Hallmark cards fill the void and help these people show support.

If you know someone who has been diagnosed or is battling cancer that is a bit more "off color", you might want to give these Cancer Greeting Cards a look! Visit FunnyCancerShirts.com to give them a look!

Really? She has CANCER?!

2009-03-31T08:29:00.003-05:00

As many of you know, I am a photographer. About a year ago I started shooting classic pinup type shots.

Renee has got to be the most AMAZING gal I have shot pinups with to date.
14 years ago she was diagnosed with Cervical Cancer. She has relapsed a few times since and is currently undergoing treatment at the Cleveland Clinic for her illness.
Oh yeah, forgot to mention that Renee is the mother of 5 little girls, INCLUDING TRIPLETS!
Yeah, mother of 5 that is currently fighting cancer. You would NEVER know it by looking at her pic.

Welcome to the club!

2009-03-28T13:44:00.003-05:00

Today I had to welcome a very good friend to the "Cancer Club".
A long time buddy of mine was recently diagnosed with a very rare form of appendix cancer. When I say VERY RARE, I mean under 1000 people diagnosed per year. In my immediate group of friends, this make 3 of us that have had some wacky, rare form of cancer!
I am sure he will make it his Bitch!

Fucking cancer...

My blog was listed in top 30 Inspirational Cancer Survivor Blogs

2009-03-27T17:57:00.000-05:00

My friend Kelly send me an email today to let me know that my cancer blog was listed in an article written about cancer blogs.
Below is a little blurb about the list as well as what they say about my blog.

Top 30 Inspirational Cancer Survivor Blogs
No matter how the doctor delivers the news, cancer is a devastating blow. Then, you have the privilege of telling your family and friends, tolerating chemotherapy and dealing with a roller coaster of emotions. Sometimes letting it all hang out and facing it can be the best way to deal with an enormous obstacle. Our top 30 inspirational individual cancer survival blogs do just that, and, not only is it therapeutic for individual, it’s therapeutic for the families involved and other patients encountering cancer as well. Read on for some heavy inspiration from these highly personal journeys.

25. I Made Cancer My B**ch! – A light-hearted look at a Hogdkin’s Lymphoma survivor. Blogger Ryan Armbrust takes you through his whole cancer treatment while remaining completely positive about 98 percent of the time.

It's a very good list, and I'm not just saying that because I am listed!
Give it a look by clicking here!

31 Ways to Prevent Cancer!

2009-01-07T14:34:00.004-05:00

31 Simple Ways To Prevent Cancer
from Reader’s Digest

Consider this number: 10 million. That's how many cases of cancer are diagnosed worldwide each year. Now consider this number: 15 million. That's how many cases of cancer the World Health Organization estimates will be diagnosed in the year 2020 -- a 50 percent increase -- if we don't get our act together.   Most cancers don't develop overnight or out of nowhere. Cancer is largely predictable, the end result of a decades-long process, but just a few simple changes in your daily life can significantly reduce your risk.

Here are 31 great tips.   

1. Serve sauerkraut at your next picnic. A Finnish study found that the fermentation process involved in making sauerkraut produces several other cancer-fighting compounds, including ITCs, indoles, and sulforaphane. To reduce the sodium content, rinse canned or jarred sauerkraut before eating.
2. Eat your fill of broccoli, but steam it rather than microwaving it. Broccoli is a cancer-preventing superfood, one you should eat frequently. But take note: A Spanish study found that microwaving broccoli destroys 97 percent of the vegetable's cancer-protective flavonoids. So steam it, eat it raw as a snack, or add it to soups and salads.
3. Toast some Brazil nuts and sprinkle over your salad. They're a rich form of selenium, a trace mineral that convinces cancer cells to commit suicide and helps cells repair their DNA. A Harvard study of more than 1,000 men with prostate cancer found those with the highest blood levels of selenium were 48 percent less likely to develop advanced disease over 13 years than men with the lowest levels. And a dramatic five-year study conducted at Cornell University and the University of Arizona showed that 200 micrograms of selenium daily -- the amount in two unshelled Brazil nuts -- resulted in 63 percent fewer prostate tumors, 58 percent fewer colorectal cancers, 46 percent fewer lung malignancies, and a 39 percent overall decrease in cancer deaths.   
4. Pop a calcium supplement with vitamin D. A study out of Dartmouth Medical School suggests that the supplements reduce colon polyps (a risk factor for colon cancer) in people susceptible to the growths.   
5. Add garlic to everything you eat. Garlic contains sulfur compounds that may stimulate the immune system's natural defenses against cancer, and may have the potential to reduce tumor growth. Studies suggest that garlic can reduce the incidence of stomach cancer by as much as a factor of 12!   
6. Sauté two cloves of crushed garlic in 2 tablespoons of olive oil, then mix in a can of low-sodium, diced tomatoes. Stir gently until heated and serve over whole wheat pasta. We already mentioned the benefits of garlic. The lycopene in the tomatoes protects against colon, prostate, and bladder cancers; the olive oil helps your body absorb the lycopene; and the fiber-filled pasta reduces your risk of colon cancer. As for the benefits of all of these ingredients together: They taste great!
  7. Every week, buy a cantaloupe at the grocery store and cut it up after you put away your groceries. Store it in a container and eat several pieces every morning. Cantaloupe is a great source of carotenoids, plant chemicals shown to significantly reduce the risk of lung cancer.
The Power of Antioxidants
8. Mix half a cup of blueberries into your morning cereal. Blueberries rank number one in terms of their antioxidant power. Antioxidants neutralize free radicals, which are unstable compounds that can damage cells and lead to diseases including cancer.   
9. Learn to eat artichokes tonight. Artichokes are a great source of silymarin, an antioxidant that may help prevent skin cancer. To eat these delicious veggies, peel off the tough outer leaves on the bottom, slice the bottom, and cut off the spiky top. Then boil or steam until tender, about 30-45 minutes. Drain. Dip each leaf in a vinaigrette or garlic mayonnaise, then gently tear the fibrous covering off with your front teeth, working your way inward to the tender heart. Once there, gently scoop the bristles from the middle of the heart, dip in a little butter or lemon juice, and enjoy!   
10. Coat barbecue food with a thick sauce. Grilling meat can create a variety of cancer-causing chemicals. But researchers from the American Institute for Cancer Research found that coating the meat with a thick marinade and thereby preventing direct contact with the charring flames reduced the amount of such chemicals created. Another tip: Precook your meat in the oven and then throw it on the grill to finish.   
11. Every time you go to the bathroom, stop by the kitchen or water cooler for a glass of water. A major study published in The New England Journal of Medicine in 1996 found that men who drank six 8-ounce glasses of water every day slashed their risk of bladder cancer in half. Another study linked the amount of water women drank to their risk of colon cancer, with heavy water drinkers reducing their risk up to 45 percent.   
12. Take up a tea habit. The healing powers of green tea have been valued in Asia for thousands of years. In the West, new research reveals that it protects against a variety of cancers as well as heart disease. Some scientists believe that a chemical in green tea called EGCG could be one of the most powerful anticancer compounds ever discovered.   
13. Have a beer tonight. Beer protects against the bacterium Helicobacter pylori, known to cause ulcers and possibly linked to stomach cancer. But don't overdo it. Drinking more than one or two alcoholic drinks a day may increase your risk of mouth, throat, esophageal, liver, and breast cancer.   14. Throw some salmon on the grill tonight. Australian researchers studying Canadians (go figure) found those who ate four or more servings of fish per week were nearly one-third less likely to develop the blood cancers leukemia, myeloma, and non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. Other studies show a link between eating fatty fish (salmon, mackerel, halibut, sardines, and tuna, as well as shrimp and scallops) with a reduced risk of endometrial cancer in women. Ah, those amazing omega-3s at it again!
15. Take a multivitamin every morning. Many studies suggest getting the ideal levels of vitamins and minerals can improve your immune system function and help prevent a variety of cancers.
16. Get about 15 minutes of sunlight on your skin each day. You've heard of the sunshine vitamin, vitamin D haven't you? Turns out we've been so good at heeding advice to slather on sun lotion and avoid the sun's rays that many of us aren't getting enough of this valuable nutrient. Researchers find that getting too little vitamin D may increase your risk of multiple cancers, including breast, colon, prostate, ovarian, and stomach, as well as osteoporosis, diabetes, multiple sclerosis, and high blood pressure.   The best source? Exposure to UVB rays found in natural and artificial sunlight. About 15 minutes a day ought to do it. Avoid overexposure, of course. That can increase your risk for cancers of the skin. You can also get vitamin D in your calcium supplement if you choose a supplement that contains both.
17. Carry a shot glass in your beach bag. Then fill it with sunscreen and rub it all over your body. A shot glass holds about 1.5 ounces, which is how much sunscreen dermatologists estimate you need to protect yourself from the cancer-causing UV rays of the sun. Repeat every two hours.   
18. Cut a kiwifruit in half, then scoop out the flesh with a spoon. Now eat! Kiwi is a little hand grenade of cancer-fighting antioxidants, including vitamin C, vitamin E, lutein, and copper. You can also rub a couple of cut kiwifruit on a low-fat cut of meat as a tenderizer.   
19. Use a condom and stick to one partner. The more sexual partners a woman has, the greater her risk of contracting human papillomavirus, or HPV, which causes cervical cancer. Having an unfaithful husband also increases her risk.
20. Cut out high-fat animal protein. A Yale study found that women who ate the most animal protein had a 70 percent higher risk of developing non-Hodgkin's lymphoma, while those who ate diets high in saturated fat increased their risk 90 percent. So switch to low-fat or nonfat dairy, have poultry or fish instead of beef or pork, and use olive oil instead of butter.   
21. Have your partner feed you grapes. They're great sources of resveratrol, the cancer-protecting compound found in wine, but don't have the alcohol of wine, which can increase the risk of breast cancer in women. Plus, the closeness such an activity engenders (we hope) strengthens your immune system.   
22. Sprinkle scallions over your salad. A diet high in onions may reduce the risk of prostate cancer 50 percent. But the effects are strongest when they're eaten raw or lightly cooked. So try scallions, Vidalia onions, shallots, or chives for a milder taste.   
23. Make a batch of fresh lemonade or limeade. A daily dose of citrus fruits may cut the risk of mouth, throat, and stomach cancers by half, Australian researchers found.
24. Take a 30-minute walk every evening after dinner. That's all it takes to reduce your breast cancer risk, according to a study from the Fred Hutchinson Cancer Research Center in Seattle. Turns out that moderate exercise reduces levels of estrogen, a hormone that contributes to breast cancer. When 170 overweight, couch potato women ages 50-75 did some form of moderate exercise for about three hours a week, levels of circulating estrogen dropped significantly after three months. After a year, those who lost at least 2 percent of their body fat had even greater decreases in estrogen. Another study linked four hours a week of walking or hiking with cutting the risk of pancreatic cancer in half. The benefits are probably related to improved insulin metabolism due to the exercise.   
25. Buy organic foods. They're grown without added pesticides or hormones, both of which can cause cellular damage that may eventually lead to cancer.
26. Learn to love dandelions. Using commercial pesticides on your lawn may increase your risk of cancer, since most contain pesticides such as 2,4-D (linked to non-Hodgkin's lymphoma) and MCPP (associated with soft-tissue cancers). Plus, pesticides used solely on lawns don't have to go through the same rigorous testing for long-term health effects as those used on food. And, as E/The Environmental Magazine noted in a 2004 article, no federal studies have assessed the safety of lawn-care chemicals in combination, the way most are sold.   
27. Buy clothes that don't need to be dry-cleaned. Many dry cleaners still use a chemical called perc (perchloroethylene), found to cause kidney and liver damage and cancer in animals repeatedly exposed through inhalation. Buying clothes that don't require dry cleaning, or hand washing them yourself, can reduce your exposure to this chemical. If you must dry-clean your clothes, take them out of the plastic bag and air them outside or in another room before wearing.
28. Choose cucumbers over pickles, fresh salmon over lox. Studies find that smoked and pickled foods contain various carcinogens.
  29. Switch from french fries and potato chips to mashed potatoes and pretzels. A potential cancer-causing compound called acrylamide forms as a result of the chemical changes that occur in foods when they're baked, fried, or roasted. Not surprisingly, many foods with the greatest amounts of acrylamide are also some of the worst-for-you foods, such as french fries, potato chips, and baked sweets. Although the results aren't final yet, Michael Jacobson, Ph.D., executive director of the Center for Science in the Public Interest, estimates acrylamide causes between 1,000 and 25,000 cancers per year. His agency has petitioned the Food and Drug Administration to set limits on the amount of acrylamide foods can contain. The FDA is studying the issue.   
30. Go for a spray-on tan. They're available in most tanning salons these days and, unlike tanning beds, there's no evidence that they increase your risk of skin cancer.   
31. Call up your bowling pal and hit the lanes. A study from the State University of New York at Stony Brook found that men with high levels of stress and those with less satisfying contacts with friends and family members had higher levels of prostate-specific antigen (PSA) in their blood, a marker for the development of prostate cancer.

1 year PET Scan was today...

2008-11-18T23:31:00.005-05:00

Today I had my one year PET Scan. I think things went pretty well, I will get the "Official" word next Tuesday.
I asked the Tech to burn my scan to a disc, he did it without any smooth talking on my part. I think that is a good sign. I know what my "Dirty" scan looks like, this one looks nothing like it. My first PET made my inside look like it was wrapped up in cheap-ass Christmas lights!

Have a look for yourself!

I also found out today that my shot of the Palace Theater won the grand prize for the Capture Kentuckiana book. First place out of 12,000 pics! I also sold 2 $400 Kentucky Derby pics to a customer on my photography website.

In the words of our Saviour , Ice-Cube, I gotta say it was a good day!

Yogurt Lids fight cancer?

2008-09-22T22:38:00.004-05:00

I was watching tv tonight and noticed a Yoplait Yogurt commercial in which they are asking everyone to send in their yogurt lids as part of a fundraiser.

From the Yoplait website:
During our annual drive, for every pink lid you send in Yoplait® will donate 10 cents to Susan G. Komen for the Cure®, up to $1.5 million. And we guarantee a donation of at least $500,000. So grab your friends, coworkers, yoga class or neighbors and start getting involved today.

10 cents for every lid!?
Why not just donate the price of postage directly to the Susan G. Komen Foundation? Do the simple math, one person sends one lid to Yoplait. They spent a MINIMUM of 42 cents for postage! That's over 4 times the money that would be raised!
Am I missing something here?

I'm no hippie, but it would seem that Yoplait is killing the environment as well. They want you to rinse the lid, bag it in a plastic bag and mail it.
Waste water, waste gas and use a shit ton of plastic.

World Lymphoma Awareness Day? WTF?

2008-09-16T09:13:00.002-05:00

So yesterday was World Lymphoma Awareness Day...
Wait one damn minute!
I had Lymphoma and did not know we had our own fancy day dedicated to us. I would STILL not know about this if My bubby Duane had not mentioned it. I guess those folks over at the Lymphoma Coalition are really doing a great job getting the word out!

From this day forward, I declare September 16th "WORLD BISCUITS AND GRAVY DAY"!

Hurricane Ike!

2008-09-15T08:16:00.005-05:00

Hurricane Ike put the smack down on Louisville just like he did on Tina Turner back in the day. Nothing like starting a blog post with a little domestic abuse joke.

It was a very interesting weekend. Friday afternoon the house two doors down from ours burnt to the ground. I was at work and kept hearing on the radio that the "250 block of Pope St. had a huge house fire at this time". Wait! I live at 251!
Firefighters had to rescue one of the home owners and revive them in our front yard. The EMTs left all the bloody medical debris in our front yard as a souvenir. Bloody gauze and gloves everywhere.

Sunday, Hurricane Ike moved in. We had winds gusting over 80 miles per hour for 8 hours non stop. No rain though, it was a totally sunning day. Very strange.
About every old tree in the area is now laying in the streets or on a house. Our power went out around 3pm Sunday. Actually, over a quarter million homes are without power right now in Louisville. The Governor declaired a State of Emergency for Louisville. THis is the worst storm we have had since the big tornado of 1974 that wipe the city clean.

Also, the Ryder Cup starts today in Louisville. Hurricane Ike wiped out the entire Ryder Cup area. All of the corporate tents were blown through out the surrounding area. Also, a tv tower was knocked down destoying the 12th green.

HERE'S THE SUCKY THING, I am sure that all efforts are focused on getting the Ryder Cup up and running so Louisville doesn't lose the biggest source of revenue we have ever seen. The city is saying we will be without power for a week. I bet the Ryder Cup has power by the end of the day.

No hotels, no gas, no power!
All hotels are booked for Ryder Cup folks. Only 1/3 of the gas stations have gas. The majority of Louisville is without power. Traffic is a nightmare. All traffic lights are out. Cars crashing everywhere.

More details as they unfold...

Vote for my pics in the Capture Kentuckiana project!

2008-08-02T08:33:00.003-05:00

The Courier Journal is running a photo contest of sorts to pic images for a coffee table book. I have about 30 images entered. My most popular pics are listed below. PLEASE GO VOTE FOR THEM! You do have to start an account. Just name and email, they do not send you anything. It is just to keep the voting fair.

New addition to Gnome Wonderland!

2008-07-18T10:22:00.005-05:00

So the other day a package came in the mail from Wullie & Veronica. They are the Scottish couple that we met on the Hodgkin's message board, as well as in Boston for the Hodge-a-Palooza trip. (See Below)
ANYWAY, in this package was a garden gnome wearing a Celtic Football jersey. Wullie is a huge Celtic fan, to say the least.
That little guy looks quite happy in his new home!

Hodge-a-Palooza - Beantown 2008

2008-07-07T07:48:00.007-05:00

Hard to believe that all the people below just finished kicking cancer's ass!

What the hell is a Hodge-a-Palooza?

Well, over the past 2 years I have been talking to other folks that have, or have had, Hodgkin's through an online message board.

Some time ago a couple that lives in Scotland decided to visit one of the girls that lives in Boston. The rest of us decided to crash the party.

To be honest, Jenny and I did not know what to expect. It was like an internet first date x 30! Would we have to make up some lame reason to leave after we all first met? Not a chance. This was such a fun group to be around. Mostly a bunch of shit talkers and "Good Time Charlies" like me, so that worked out great. Already looking forward to the next meet up.

6 months clean!

2008-05-14T10:05:00.001-05:00

Today I called my Onc's office and started bugging them for my PET scan results. I did not want to wait around until my appointment date (4 days from now)to find out if my cancer was back.

Scan came back 100% clean, no cancer. I do have some enlarged lymph nodes in my chest area that they want to keep an eye on though.
unless I develop symptoms, my next scan will be in November.

6 Month Scan

2008-05-14T08:36:00.002-05:00

Well, I had my 6 month PET CT scan yesterday. Everything went well. I am still waiting on the results. Cancer was fun and all, but I think I could do without it again!

Since I don't have Cancer...

2008-02-24T18:34:00.004-05:00

Since I don't have cancer, I really do not have anything to report. That is why I decided to add some of my favorite videos to my blog.

The first one I would like to play for you features the TECHNO VIKING!
This guy is whacked out on something really good, better than anything I ever took during chemo.
Watch it all the way through, trust me...

Give 'em Hell Techno Viking!

If he can't out dance you, he will just kick your ass!

Since so many people have been watching the Techno Viking, it was just a matter of time before people started posting spin off videos.
Here is my favorite!

What the hell, here's one more.

Today I had my 3 month check-up!

2008-02-12T13:17:00.001-05:00

Went to the Oncologist today for my 3 month check-up. Everything was normal. My blood test came back showing that all levels were good to go.
I am scheduled for a PET/CT scan in April.
Keep your fingers crossed...

New Cancer Shirts Video!

2007-12-16T16:52:00.000-05:00

More ChucklenutShirts.com propaganda!

Our Christmas movie staring Jenny, Chris, Todd, Kenny & Myself!

2007-12-15T09:23:00.001-05:00

Press the play button to watch the movie!

My Future Cancer Plans!

2007-11-08T09:24:00.001-05:00

Well, now that I have gotten the "All Clear" from my Onc. He has told me the game plan.

I have to keep my port for a year. This means I have to go in for a port flush every month. No big deal.
I am scheduled to see the Oncologist every 3 months until who knows when. First appointment will be January of 2008.
I need a PET Scan every 6 months to make sure that bastard, Mr. Cancer, has not returned.

I am feeling O.K. still get tired easily and still can not focus on anything. They say you get to hold on to the chemo brain for a while after you finish chemo. YEAH!

What has 2 thumbs and NO cancer?

2007-10-04T10:30:00.004-05:00

THIS GUY!

So today I woke up and decided I did not want to wait for my Oncologist to get back from ANOTHER vacation so I called and demanded my PET/CT results. The nurse practitioner told me that NOTHING was showing up on the scan. EVERYTHING had gone bye bye!
I still have an Oncologist appointment this Monday to find out what the next step is, but right now all clean!
I MADE CANCER MY BITCH!

Back from Key West, FINALLY!

2007-10-01T13:48:00.003-05:00

The trip to Key West was pretty fun and very relaxing. The B&B was great, all the snazzy restaurants we ate at were great, the drag queen dressed as the bee from the Blind Mellon video was great and the weather was great.

The flights sucked!

On the way there, we flew into a storm above the Keys. We had to circle for an hour, then fly back to Ft. Lauderdale and land. We sat there for another few hours. Got to the B&B after they closed. Had to disturb the inn keeper.

On the way back, it took us 11 hours. Should have taken us 4. When we got to the Key West airport, the ticket counter lady told us our flight was a few hours late. We would miss our connection in Orlando. She gave us 3 sets of flight tickets and wished us luck. We had tickets for 3 of the 6 flights leaving for the day. The Key West airport is like the airport on the TV show Wings. The only difference is that the Key West Airport is WAY suckier.

After sitting in the airport for over an hour, they tell us to move to another area because our plane was coming in. The area was outside in the 90 degree weather under a metal roof on the black runway. IT WAS ABOUT 125 DEGREES IN THIS SITTING AREA! I was making my own gravy!

2 hours after we were to leave, a plane arrives. Not our plane, but another plane. We get on the plane. After we sat down, we noticed that the ticket counter lady was standing on the runway directing our plane with those nifty little flash light things. She gave us a thumbs up!

To make this long story short, we flew from Key West to Orlando. Sat in Orlando for 3 hours, flew to Atlanta. Sat in Atlanta for a few hours and flew to Louisville. Got in 6 hours late.

The beginning sucked, the end sucked and here are pics from the middle which was great.

Click here for all the pics!

My next PET Scan

2007-09-13T15:09:00.001-05:00

I go for my next PET Scan October 1st. Takes a few days for the results.
This will let us know if I kicked its ass or not!

Last Chemo, Part 2!

2007-08-30T17:44:00.001-05:00

Well, today was my last chemo.
Heard this one before...
I guess I get to wear the graduation cap AGAIN!

Things were kinda strange with my port today. My nurse could not get the needle into it. She tried twice and called another nurse in. She got it in no problem. They said the ports can shift.

My blood counts were good, I am a little anemic though.
It took 16 chemos to make me anemic, NOT TOO BAD!
This explains why I have been so damn tired for the past 2 weeks.

Now I wait 5-6 weeks to have another PET Scan.

I want the new IMac!

2007-08-23T09:46:00.000-05:00

I am getting really sick and tired of editing photos and designing shirts on my tired, slow PC. What I need is the new IMac! The 24", 2.8 GHz model to be exact.
If any of you want to purchase this great machine for a cancer patient, I know one who will GLADLY accept it. "Nudge Nudge, Wink Wink"

Click Here To Buy Me A MAC!

Chemo #15

2007-08-17T13:14:00.001-05:00

I had my 15th chemo yesterday. Nothing to report, everything went swell. The chemo hit me a little sooner than normal this time.

Still have all my hair, it is getting a little more gray though.

Still have not puked.

Blood counts went up from my last chemo.

As long as this shit works, everything is going well.

Chemo #14!

2007-08-03T17:32:00.001-05:00

Chemo #14 went just like all the others. Blood counts have slipped a little bit, but are still in the safe zone. No need for the nasty bone marrow growth shots.

Was feeling pretty good this morning so I went out and shot some pics of the Art Cars that are in town for the weekend.
Here are some pics.

Click Here For More Pics!

Chucklenut in the Newspaper!

2007-07-28T12:25:00.000-05:00

Today the local newspaper ran a story about me and my cancer shirts.
Click here to check it out!
A huge thanks to Angie Fenton for writing such a great article. It turned out far better than I expected!

New chemo dose, not so bad

2007-07-25T07:53:00.002-05:00

My Oncologist said that this new chemo dose would knock me on my ass, make my hair fall out and make me projectile vomit for days.

NONE OF THIS HAPPENED!

The only thing different from my original dose was that it seemed to hit me a little sooner. Instead of catching up with me about 24 hours after dosing, it got me about 12 hours after. It also seemed to hang out a little longer. Normally I am back to normal by Tuesday, but it took an extra day this time.

Still have my hair and still have not puked.

Chemo # 13! Chemo was so nice, thought I'd do it twice.

2007-07-19T17:22:00.001-05:00

Had chemo #13, or chemo #1 of the new fancy high dose stuff. So far pretty lackluster.

Could not go to the Cottage Inn for lunch today, they are closed for remodeling. Maybe next time. I had to settle for a huge turkey club and pasta salad from the City Cafe.

I will update this post in a few days to let everyone know what if anything happened to me on this new dose.

Wanna read my PET Scan results?

2007-07-13T13:01:00.001-05:00

Below you will find the two pages of PET Scan results. Click the image to view a larger more legible copy.

Enjoy the read!

Still making cancer my bitch!

2007-07-12T15:28:00.001-05:00

Just got home from the Oncologist, the short of it is that I still have my buddy Mr. Cancer.

The PET Scan report showed that the cancer in my lung and chest area is considered "background" meaning damn near gone. When I was diagnosed it was a 13 out of 16 as far as uptake. Now it is nothing. The chest stuff was pretty severe, now it is pretty much cleared up.

The cancer in my neck is gone.

The cancer in my armpit is gone.

I still have a touch of the cancer in the lymph nodes around my spleen and liver.

The Oncologist said that they gave me the chemo dose based on a 170 pound 5'11" male.
I am 6'3" tall and 350 pounds. For those of you not skilled in basic math, I AM TWICE THE SIZE OF THAT 170 POUNDER!

It has been a standard to stop at the doses I got as the maximums, but they had not treated anyone as big as me in the past. They were nervous about giving me more because they didn't know how I'd tolerate them. Since I did so well with the first 6 cycles, they have decided that I can probably tolerate the higher doses.

They are going to start me back on ABVD chemo at higher doses on Thursday July 19th. This means that my hair will probably all fall out and I will more than likely lose my 12 year "NO PUKE" streak. I will receive chemo every other Thursday 4 times.

You would have thought that since the dose was so small and I had NO CHEMO SIDE EFFECTS that maybe they would have upped the dose earlier. GUESS NOT!

Stay tuned, it ain't over till a woman my size sings...

Post chemo PET scan today!

2007-07-05T14:19:00.001-05:00

Went in today for my post chemo PET scan today. I have an oncologist appointment July 12th to get the results. This scan was just as bad as my first one. If you remember, they had Christmas music BLARING the whole time I was getting scanned. This time, they just had the radio on some easy rock station. The one bad thing was that we were in the middle of a drought for the past month or so, until today. The D.J. felt the need to play a craptastic rainy day mega that just went on FOREVER!

Below are some of the "Gems"

Phil Collins - Wish it Would Rain
Barry Manilow - Rain
Van Morrison - Raincheck
Gordon Lightfoot - Rainy Day People
Eddie Rabbitt - I Love a Rainy Night

Chemo Graduation!

2007-06-08T13:27:00.001-05:00

Yesterday was my Chemo Graduation! Jenny and I took the chemo staff a big plate of Heitzmans bakery cookies along with a card that said "No offense, but I hope I never see any of you again!"

They ate cookies, I got fed more poison. A fun time was had by all!

I go in July 5th for a PET scan. This is the test where they insert a Pringles can full of radiation into me and make me lay in a tube for an hour. At least this time they will not be pumping Christmas music into the tube!

Hopefully I made Cancer my Bitch!

Had me some more of that fancy Chemo yesterday!

2007-05-24T16:22:00.001-05:00

Had my chemo Wednesday this time, just couldn't wait to get some more of it in me! One more to go. After the last chemo, I will wait one month and then go in on July 5th for a PET / CT scan.

Here are some pics from chemo!

Check out my Cancer Shirts!

2007-05-14T12:09:00.000-05:00

The other day I received an EMail from some fancy Dr. Lady that loved my Cancer shirts. She had a few questions to ask me, I answered them. A couple days later, I have a small write up on her website.
CLICK HERE TO READ THE WRITE UP!

Derby Chemo down, ONLY 2 MORE TO GO!

2007-05-10T18:26:00.002-05:00

Had another chemo today. No big deal. Boring as usual.

After Chemo we went shopping for Mother's day and My Mom's B-Day.

This past weekend was really busy. Friday, Marty and I went to the Oaks race at Churchill Downs all day. We then went to 3 red carpet events, one of which was the Crown Royal / Playboy party. Went to bed around 4:30am. Got up at 8:30am and went to the Derby for 12 hours.

Gonna be nice to sit around for 3-4 days.

Here are a few of my Derby pics. We had full press Creds from Churchill Downs that included roof top access as well as Millionares Row and the Winners Circle. We also had press creds for the 2 week long Derby Festival. WE ABUSED THEM. At the track, we had a private media parking lot with bathroom and guard. We then jumped on a private media shuttle that dropped us off at a private media entrance. From Marty's house to the rooftop (Private media elevator) of Churchill only took us 30 minutes. Normally, it would take 2-3 hours as a "COMMONER".

Check out My Photo Website for more Derby pics! Pics do not look that great when I post them on my blog.

Pegasus Parade Pics

2007-05-04T08:50:00.002-05:00

It was rainy and crappy outside, but we went anyway. I have enough blue sky pics of the parade, these have a different look.

More Pics Here!

The Great Steam Boat Race.

2007-05-03T08:46:00.001-05:00

I rode on the Belle of Louisville yesterday for the Steam Boat Race. Pretty good time. It rained most of the time, so my pics are kinda gloomy.

The rest of the pics!

Chemo #9, 3 more to go!

2007-04-27T09:20:00.002-05:00

Same old shit, Jenny and I went for our light snack of Cottage Inn. Did something different today, I got the Meat Loaf and vegetable soup.
All counts looked good, still have all my hair, gained a little more weight, still have not gotten sick BLA BLA BLA..

After chemo, Jenny and I went down to the waterfront for the Balloon Glow, part of the Derby Fest.

CLICK HERE FOR MY DERBY FESTIVAL PICS!

Thunder Over Louisville pics!

2007-04-22T11:27:00.002-05:00

Jenny and I went over to the Indiana side to watch Thunder this year. Click on the link to visit my website and view the pics.
THUNDER PICS!

I rode in a Huey today!

2007-04-21T07:06:00.001-05:00

All the teams were practicing for The Thunder over Louisville airshow today. I went down to Waterfront park and rode around Louisville in a Huey. Good Times. The waiver I signed said no one could ride if they had a current medical condition. Does cancer and chemo count?

Chemo Number 8!

2007-04-06T16:12:00.001-05:00

Well, pretty uneventful as always.
Cottage Inn for lunch. Blood counts were great. Not sick from the chemo. Still Fat Hairy. This Cancer shit is getting to be a real bore.

I will not be getting chemo for 3 weeks. I changed my chemo schedule because of the Kentucky Derby Festival. I have full access media passes to every event. I even got the Churchill Downs passes this year. I can walk right up to Millionaires row and snap pics all day long.

4 MORE TO GO!

Chemo 7 of 12 today

2007-03-22T18:05:00.001-05:00

Jenny and I did the normal routine, ate a hunk of meat at the Cottage Inn.

We then headed over to Cancerville to get my chemo going.
When I got there, they did the normal blood tests like they always do.
This time, they came back showing that my white and red counts were still climbing!
Great news!

They also came back with a very strange reading on the blood work as well...

Wait for it...

Wait for it...

THEY SAID MY BLOOD WAS DEFICIENT IN PROTEIN!
What the hell! Do these people not know what I shove into my meat hole on a daily basis? I just ate a HUGE hunk of meat an hour before the blood test.

Dr. told me to eat more Meat!
Cool!

Other than that, everything is all sausages and rainbows over here.
Still have not lost any hair and I am still gaining weight.
5 more to go.

Chemo #6 HALF WAY DONE!

2007-03-08T18:06:00.001-05:00

Lunch at the cottage Inn.
Blood counts went up again, good.
Got my Chemo.
Came home.

Feel fine, still have all my hair, bla,bla,bla...
You all know how this goes.
I will update if things turn south, but again, another boring blog post.
I am going to start making things up if it gets any more dull.
I have already told a few people that my biopsy scars were from getting into a knife fight with a monkey!

Now go buy some T-Shirts!

Thanks for the Dominoes, Mom & Dad!

My NEW T-Shirt Website!

2007-02-28T10:26:00.004-05:00

While sitting around bored a week ago, I decided to start a T-Shirt website, ChucklenutShirts.com. The site is still under construction, new designs added daily. All of the designs on the website were made by me using photoshop. Most of the sayings are mine, but some are not. Pretty much all of the shirts are offensive in nature. If this poses a problem for your "morals", don't click on the banner below.

You don't have to buy a shirt, but do tell everyone you know about my new website.

Thanks!

So far so good...

2007-02-26T10:42:00.001-05:00

After my chemo last Thursday, Jenny and I went to the Grand Opening of our new building at Century Entertainment. I was feeling pretty good.

Friday I just stayed home and rested, did not really do much of anything. Felt fine.

Saturday, Jenny and I went out to lunch. This was the first time I have left the house on a "Chemo Saturday". Later that night, we went out to dinner with friends. Felt great.

I still have all my hair and have not puked!

This must be the most boring cancer blog on the internet!

Chemo #5!

2007-02-22T22:57:00.001-05:00

Went in for chemo number 5 today after my ceremonial Salisbury Steak from the Cottage Inn. Everything went as planned.
One thing was kinda strange though. My white and red blood cell counts have gotten BETTER with each chemo. This is very odd, GOOD, but odd.
Most peoples counts take a dive after a few chemos. When this happens, your chemo is put off for about a week while they shoot you full of drugs to make more white blood cells grow. These shots make your bones hurt REALLY bad. The best way to fight Cancer is to stay on schedule with chemo. So far so good.

Just another way that I am making Cancer my BITCH!
Now put this ball gag in and...

I will update this post in a few days to let everyone know how this round treated me.

Caught a cold!

2007-02-20T08:45:00.001-05:00

Today I have a cold.
The whole right side of my head is clogged up and I have a sore throat.
Also feel pretty tired.
Good times here in Cancerville!

Chemo Brain

2007-02-15T10:36:00.001-05:00

I guess my only big gripe right now is the Chemo Brain. Chemo makes you forget things. Short term memory is kinda flighty. It also keeps you from concentrating on things. Everyone I have talked to, that has been through chemo, has mentioned this.

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Chemo #4, 1/3 of the way done!

2007-02-08T17:43:00.001-05:00

I just got home from Chemo #4.
We started every Chemo, as Jenny and I always do, by eating lunch at the Cottage Inn.
Everyone says that you are not supposed to eat anything more than light snacks before chemo, I guess my idea of a "LIGHT SNACK" is a little different.

Today, and just like the 2 previous trips for Chemo, I had the Salisbury steak covered in gravy with Mashed Potatoes smothered in MORE gravy and lastly some corn. I also had a bowl of Vegetable soup.

The chunk of Salisbury steak was bigger than a Midgets fist, and tasted better as well.
I have never tasted a Midgets fist, but I am guessing it would be made better with copious amounts of gravy.

Got to the Oncologists office around 1pm, blood counts looked good so they gave me my Chemo. Got home around 5pm.

This chemo went really well. I was just really tired Saturday and Sunday. Did not feel sick at all.

I still have a nice thick coat, like a Yeti !

Big Ryan's Bikini Carwash Fundraiser.

2007-02-04T11:57:00.001-05:00

A good friend of mine did a Photoshop for me a few days ago.
I think it is a great idea. I don't know what the funds raised will go for, but I am sure I will figure it out.

Chemo #3!

2007-01-29T11:23:00.001-05:00

My third chemo went smoothly. I got the chemo on Thursday, January 25th. I ran errands all day Friday. Saturday felt really tired and just stayed home for the weekend and slept. Did not feel sick and I ate like a horse.
By Monday, I was ready to get out of the house and visit with friends.

I am as hairy as ever and still have not puked.

Chemo #2

2007-01-16T11:17:00.001-05:00

Chemo number two was given to me 2 weeks later on Thursday January 11th, 2006.

The actual process of getting the chemo went exactly the same as the first one, but it only took 3 hours.

The big difference was how I felt after. I did not need to take any of the anti nausea meds. I just felt like I had a cold for 3 days. Got chemo on Thursday and laid around the house until Tuesday. Then I was back to normal. I actually was feeling better than I have felt in over a year.

Still have not lost any hair and still am holding on to my "12 years with no Puking" title.

Taste Buds, "You want fries with that"?

2007-01-03T11:51:00.001-05:00

My taste buds are really messed up after chemo.
Sweet stuff just tastes NASTY.
Salty tastes normal.

I have always hated the "Film" that McDonalds leaves in my mouth. There is something about thier food that is just scary. Remembering this, I thought that if I ate some McDonalds fries, the "not as nasty as the chemo film" from the fries would cover up the "really nasty film" from the chemo. It worked. A day or so after chemo, I eat a McDonalds Fry and the bad taste goes away. VERY STRANGE!

I think McDonolds fries will kill me quicker than this cancer.

My first CHEMO!

2007-01-02T11:00:00.001-05:00

On December 28th, 2006 I started my first of twelve chemos.
My handeler, Jenny, took me and sat there with me while the whole process unfolded.

After reading nothing but HORIBLE things about chemo I had this whole thing built up to be something really bad. A lot of people told me that a nurse takes you back into a room with 8 or so recliners full of people, some of whom are half dead, to get your chemo. You sit there with the "Half Deads" for 4-5 hours while a nurse pushes the chemo drugs into you.

Not my case.

I was taken back to a private room where one whole wall, floor to ceiling, was glass overlooking a forest. The office is 10 stories up so the view is pretty good. Also on a hill in the background is a cemetery. That's nice to look at while you are getting chemo. The room also has a T.V. and DVD player in it.

The nurse comes in and pops in an educational video from the 70's about chemo. It tells you things like "Hey, you are gonna puke for days" and "Your hair is gonna fall out tomorrow" as well as "Remember to wipe your ass real good so you don't get an infection".

After the video, my Nurse comes in and pops a needle into my port. She then does a blood count to make sure everything jives before giving me the drugs.

Blood count came back good, so she starts to push the 4 drugs into my port. I am on the ABVD type of chemo.
It takes about 4 hours. I just sit back and watch T.V. with Jenny.
Pretty uneventful.

Chemo was Thursday; I did not start to feel bad until 24 hours later. I popped Phenergan every 4 hours and was knocked out and loopy for 4 days. I didn't eat or drink for 3 days and was really tired. I did manage to hold on to my "NO PUKING FOR 12 YEARS" title. No hair fell out and I did not puke.

By Tuesday I felt well enough to leave the house and visit some friends.

The port install

2006-12-23T15:17:00.001-05:00

On December 22nd I had my port installed. The Doctor said it would be a good idea to have this since I have no veins.

I went into the hospital, they knocked me out. The surgeon installed this little disc right above my left tenderoni.

(That's what I call my nipples)

This disc is main-lined right into a vein in my chest that is a lot bigger than the ones in my arm. This will allow them to take blood and push chemo into me quick and easy.

It feels like I have a bottle cap under my skin.

The Staging Process

2006-12-22T09:17:00.001-05:00

In order to figure out what stage I am in, the Doctor tells me I get to go through all these crazy tests. The first test is a full body PET/CT Scan.

I go to this fancy clinic, one of about only 600 in the world with a PET/CT machine, and sit back in this comfy recliner. A tech comes in with a big lead box and plops it down next to me.

She opens the lead box to reveal a tube made of lead about the size of a Pringles can.

She starts an IV in my arm and then pushes the radioactive contents of this lead Pringles can into my body. I then need to lay there for an hour to let it circulate through my body.

After I am pumped full of radiation, they take me into the room with the machine and tell me to lie down on this table. She tells me that the test will take about an hour. The table starts to slide into a big plastic donut making some crazy sounds. Lucky for me the tech decides it is a good idea to turn on Christmas music to drone out the whirring sound of the machine.

KEEP IN MIND I AM DRIFTING IN AND OUT OF A HUGE DONUT WHILE LISTENING TO X-MAS MUSIC AT AN UNCOMFORTABLE LEVEL OF VOLUME FOR AN HOUR. So far, this has been the worst part of having cancer.

On to test number 2 of the day.

The MUGA scan (Multiple Gated Acquisition scan) is a noninvasive test that produces a moving image of the heart. From this image, the health of the heart’s major pumping chamber (the left ventricle) can be assessed.

My Doc makes me get this test because one of the chemo drugs they are going to give me can give you heart failure if you have a shitty heart.

This test was no big deal, other than the "Nurse in training" trying to find a vein for the very large bore needle they had to shove into my hand. Every time I need blood work done, it is a huge pain. NOBODY has been able to find a vein in my arm and only one person has been able to find a vein in my hand on the first try. I would make a crappy junky. The up and coming Nurse sticks this huge needle in my hand 5 times before I ask her if it would be a good idea to find someone with a little more experience.

The "RN' or "Real Nurse" comes in and sticks me. She only needs to try 3 times! This was a better track record than the "LPN" or "Likes to play Nurse".

After they get the IV started they pump me full of more radiation and lay me on another table. I am getting used to this routine.

After the MUGA, I was off to the hospital to do some pre admissions testing for my port install the next day. No big deal, just more blood work. This nurse only had to stick me twice behind my thumb on my wrist.

Biopsy Results

2006-12-11T21:12:00.001-05:00

After sitting around for a little over a week, the Surgeon calls about 9:30pm or so. He had looked at the biopsy results and came to the conclusion I have Hodgkin’s Lymphoma.

Merry Christmas!

The next step is the staging process.

The Biopsy

2006-12-06T10:35:00.001-05:00

The day before the Biopsy I was told not to eat or drink anything from Midnight on. This will come into play a little later.

I get to the hospital around 10am; the surgery is scheduled for noon. They do all the testing and blood work and put me in a room to wait for the surgeon. The guy performing the biopsy is one of the best Cardio Thoracic Surgeons in Louisville.

He is in very high demand as we found out.

It gets to be 12pm, no Surgeon.
1pm, no Surgeon.
2pm, no Surgeon.
I guess he shows up around 4pm or so. He had a few other operations at other hospitals that same day.

By this time, I am hungry as hell and ready starting to hallucinate. The portly orderly started to look like a corn dog.

They get me on the table around 5pm and cut me open. They made a 4 inch cut right above my breatbone and under my neck so they could remove a few lymph nodes to send off for the biopsy. I then go to recovery for 20 minutes before being let go.

The new Doctor

2006-12-01T14:20:00.002-05:00

In November, Jenny convinces me to go to her Doctor.
*From here on out, we will refer to my original Doctor as "Dr. Shitty".

The new Doctor asks why Dr. Shitty never ordered a chest X-Ray. Off I go to get my chest X-Ray.

I go in to the Doctors office for the chest x-ray results. She tells me that I might have Pulmonary Hypertension. This will kill you in 6 months or so and the only way to treat it is with a lung and heart transplant. She orders a CT scan just to be sure. Off I go to get my CT scan.

Ct scan comes back and shows that Pulmonary Hypertension is out and swollen Lymph nodes are in. Doctor orders a Lymph Node Biopsy. Off I go to get my Biopsy.

When I first started feeling bad

2006-11-23T17:15:00.001-05:00

Pretty much all of 2006 I felt kinda tired and run down. Around May of 2006 I noticed that I was getting winded walking up a flight of stairs. Now I know I am fat and out of shape, but DAMN!

I went to my Doctor; he listened to my chest and told me I had Asthma. He gave me an Inhaler and sent me on my way.

The Inhaler did nothing to help my breathing. I was wheezing so badly at night I was keeping Jenny awake. She was wearing ear plugs and I was still waking her.

I went back to my Doctor 3 more times over a 3 month period. He kept telling me I had Asthma.